Brave Girl Scout...Proud Mom

Katherine has been involved in Girl Scouts for a full year now.  It has been a wonderful experience for her.  Last Saturday the troop had their cookie sale celebration at Frankies Fun Park.  The troop got to pick four activities.  One of them, the Sky Trail, well... there's not much to say for an introduction.  Just take a look at this.

That's my child up there. I didn't take in the full intensity (and fear factor) of this attraction until they were putting the harness on her.  Oh My God, are you harnessing my child???  My baby's going up there?  Unattended?  I thought she would be apprehensive herself when she got to the first level.  Boy was I wrong.  She was fearless. FEARLESS. Walked across that balance beam up there like it was nothing. Went on every obstacle they had to offer.  Only two of them did she have to be coached and then once she got it, she got it.  In fact, I had to pull her off of because you tell she was getting exhausted and it was time for a break.  None of the scouts wanted to come down.  Another mom and the troop leader was there too and the three of us stood there amazed, snapping pictures and cheering them on.  As Ms. Dawn said, they were in their element.  I couldn't be prouder.  I'm talking wanting to pull aside random strangers and say "look at what my child is doing" kind of proud.  I'm an accordion picture wallet away from making a fool of myself.

Want to see some more??? Glad you asked!

How about some video?? Sure thing!

Oh, she did the go carts too:

And lest I question her ability to drive seeing as she's never done it before, she hit the gas pedal and took off like...yes whatever Mom, I've got this.  No crashes, just smooth sailing around the track.  Ok, maybe a bit slow, but smooth sailing nonetheless.

When they were planning this adventure, the choices were between Build and Bear and Frankies.  I have to admit I was secretly hoping for Build a Bear, if anything because there was a keepsake to take home at the end of it.  In my mind, Frankies would be a lot of money spent on games and such but nothing to take home at the end.  Boy was I wrong.  Pride and self-confidence are ten times better than a stuffed bear sitting in the mountain of stuffed things in her room.  That feeling will stay with her and grow.  And my pride of her will grow right along with it.

While the kids are away...

The kids are returning today from three weeks with their grandparents.  If you combine time spent with both Ted parents and my parents, they have been away a whole month of this summer.  This is precious time for them, a chance to have a real summer vacation of waking up and doing what kids do in the summer instead of being shuttled from daycare activity to daycare activity.  For Ted and I it's a much needed respite, one that we look forward to pretty much all year.  And for me it's usually a chance to catch up around this house.

I want to say during the time they were gone I completely reorganized the closets, cleaned out the garage, scrubbed the baseboards.  In previous years this was true.  But for some reason it just didn't happen. I did however put in a lot of running miles, we spent a couple of relaxing days at the beach and I actually read a book.  We watch a lot of Downton Abbey. And I painted a headboard.  So maybe a did get a few things done.  But I think I took a mental time out more than I used the time to catch up.  Being a type A, I don't know if that is good or bad but it is what my mind was telling me was needed. I spent the last few days telling myself that was ok.  And this morning I'm really believing it.  I'll probably feel different come tomorrow afternoon, when the house is in chaos again, although it would be in the same state whether I spent the last month cleaning the closets or not.  Right now, I'm just excited to get this day done so that I can go home and see my kiddos.  That's it.

And it feels good.

Back at It Again...

You know I couldn't stay away for long...from running that is.  I did take some time off after the Biltmore half...there was a bunch of stuff around the house I wanted to catch up on in preparation for the family being here for Katherine's First Communion.  But once that was over and the weather warmed up it was time to get moving.

Ted and I are officially signed up for the Outer Banks Marathon in November.  If I'm going to ever run a full marathon this is the one to do because it is flat.  Flatter than flat.  The only hill you encounter the whole time is the Bonner Bridge which crosses over the intercoastal waterway from Hatteras to Manteo Island. Granted, that occurs at around mile 23 so any elevation change will seem like a mountain at that point.  I've told Ted I still reserve the right to drop down to the half at the last minute.  But with 5 plus months to focus on training just for that, I'm feeling that it is a bit more doable this time around.  I'm about 6 weeks into training already and have already worked my way up to a 14 miles a couple of weeks ago.  Yup, 14 miles. That would have been unthinkable not that long ago. So I've made progress.

And this time around, I got a little help.  A while back Ted got us listening to Marathon Training Academy podcasts during our ride home from work.  I was a reluctant listener.  Maybe because I have never embraced the "I'm a runner" title, maybe because podcasts don't seem to be my cup of tea but for whatever reason I slumped in the passenger's side of the car thinking "I'd rather be listening to music right now."  And I spent most of my time discrediting the information in my head, as in it works for them but would never work for me.  I can't say that I don't do that still.  But they offer a personal coaching option.  Basically, they design personal workouts each week around your goals and current fitness levels.  The way I figure it, if I'm paying for it, I'm more likely to do it.  I will admit, it has gotten me to get into the cross training thing a bit more.

Last weekend was supposed to be a try at 16 miles.  I set off with all good intentions.  It was a great morning for summer running too, clear with low humidity and a nice breeze.  I was moving my way along, not extremely fast but I was getting the job done.  Until mile 8 when my IT band in my right leg started acting up. At mile 9 I stopped and stretched and that seemed to alleviate things for about 3/4 of a mile.  But when I hit mile 10 I knew I needed to stop and head (walk) home.  At that point I was two miles from home so while I put in 12 miles total it was not the 16 I was hoping for.  And I was frustrated with myself.  Not much to do though but rest my leg, do lots of stretching and ease back into things over the course of the week.  I ran 8 miles this weekend and the leg seemed fine.

So this coming weekend Ted and I will make another go of 16 miles.  I need to remember that this is going to be a journey over the next few months.  Not all runs are going to be wonderful.  Some might be horrible.  But the idea of actually going for all 26 seems doable right now.  I'll just have to tackle it one mile at a time.

Letting Go...

People told me that there would be certain things of the kids that would be tough to let go.  For some people it's the crib, for others the car seat.  I took apart that crib faster than Teddy and Katherine can tear apart a room.  I was so sick of carrying that heavy infant car seat around that I happily passed it on.  For me it has been their toys.  Not all of them but a few special pieces here and there that I can vividly remember the first time they were played with, the look of excitement in a little toddler's eyes.  But what makes it easier is to pass them on to other children to love.  Today we did that with the kitchen set.

I'll be totally honest and say that I pined over Katherine's kitchen set much more than she ever did.  I spied it in the Pottery Barn Kids catalog and I was smitten.  No other set would do for my little girl.  We arranged it as a birthday gift for her with all of the family chipping in a little bit.  And on that fateful day, two year old Miss K awoke from her nap to find that the downstairs had been decorated for a very special party

Many a cupcake, pizza, and button soup was made in that kitchen.  Tea parties with friends, both real and stuffed, were planned and hosted.  But in the last year or so, its use had waned.  Real cooking has become much more interesting to the kids rather than pretend.  I moved it out of Katherine's room and into the kitchen in hopes that it being front and center would lead to more use.  Alas, she was growing away from it.  Even Teddy, who loved to sneak into Katherine's room to bake up something was no longer interested now that he had free access.  In the last couple of months I realized it was time to let it go, it had hardly been touched.

Given its size and our limited storage space, tucking it away for a possible future generation was not an option.  It needed to leave the house.  I thought of donating it to the kid's daycare but it seemed too special to have a room of 10+ three olds descend upon it.  I thought of lost pieces, broken doors.  No.  Logistically it was too tough to send it north to family, no way all three pieces were going to fit in a car.  So I decided a craigslist posting would be best yet I just hadn't gotten around to taking the pictures.

I happened to mention it in a passing conversation to one of our neighbors.  She immediately responded with a "I'll buy it".  She has a 3 year old son and a 2 year old daughter, perfect ages to do some cooking.  We agreed on a price and it was done. This afternoon I cleaned everything up and Teddy helped me move it over piece by piece during the kids' nap time. He helped Ms. Holly set it all up. Just like when Katherine first received it those kids were going to wake up to a big surprise.  We snuck quietly out of the house like little elves just as she started to hear little Vivi stir.  Teddy promised to return sometime to give her and Zack a cooking lesson.
Tomorrow, in it's place, will be three new bar stools that I scored on Craigslist, strangely enough from someone just one neighborhood over.  Our kid's will be spending a lot more time perched on those stools while we make dinner, more time than they have spent playing with the kitchen set in the last six months.  And two houses over a little girl and her big brother will be cooking up a culinary feast.  Button stew may not be the specialty of that house but whatever it is it will be made by four little loving hands.  I can't wait to taste it.

The Edge of Summer

I feel like summer's been here for weeks already but we're only starting.  I'm not sure why, we haven't had a warmer than usual spring and Katherine still has a week and a half of school left.  But I had to remind myself when I looked at looked at our small tomato plants in the garden this evening...that it was only June 1st. They should be small. It's not even summer yet, officially.  But we've already had a taste of it and we're ready for more.

And what a summer coming up for the kids.  A week in Virginia.  Two weeks in Massachusetts. An end of the summer trip to see the Mouse and dine with Cindy and the girls (more on that later).  Lots of swimming.  Time with friends.  Lately the kids have been spending most of their home days outside running around with the neighborhood kids rather than inside in front of the TV.  This is as it should be.  My favorite memories of summer growing up are of playing outside from the moment we woke up until the time we went to sleep. Their still too young for Twilight Laser Tag but maybe someday.  Katherine asked this afternoon when we were going to get a new tent.  I don't know if I'm ready for a backyard camp out but I think the kids would be game.

Ted went outside with them tonight to catch fireflies.  They did it for the first time last night, kind of an impromptu moment in the neighbor's yard while the adults were chatting and drinking beer up on the porch.  Our bug man Teddy loved it, he caught a bunch with his bare hands.  I caught a peek at them running around, watching for the flashes.  I saw Teddy reach right out and grab one.  Katherine reported that she had one that "didn't want to leave me and fly away."  I see a few night time fires in the fire pit in our future, relaxing while the kids run around chasing the glow.

We've only just begun.

What I really want for Mother's Day

I got posts in my head about family, first communions and running updates.  But this one got me this morning.  Since our morning is spent getting ourselves and two kids dressed and out the door, my first 30 minutes at work is spent eating breakfast, reading email and checking up on the news (AKA, what has the state legislature done today).  But this morning I happened over to NBC News where this article caught my eye…what working moms really want for Mother’s Day.  Against my better judgment, I clicked on it.

Let’s be honest here.  I love my kids.  I love my husband.  I love spending time with them.  Do I wish there were more minutes in the day to be with them?  Most days, yes.  Do I feel that Ted and I share in the household duties?  Absolutely, it’s a regular tag team event around here. But now that the honesty’s out of the way, let’s be real. 

What would I really like for Mother’s Day?  To be left alone. 

There.  I said it.  But I know you’re all thinking it too.

A day where I’m not asked to wipe a tush, make some chocolate milk, get me this, get me that, sit next to me  and definitely not have all this requested to me all at the same time. To come back from a long run and not feel that I immediately have to jump back in, cause, wow, I've been gone over an hour.  Where a grocery run isn't the opportunity to get away. Where the sensor that was secretly implanted into my behind during childbirth that alerts one or both children to scream out "Mommy!" the second said behind so much as grazes the seat of a chair doesn't work.  Just one day where I wake up and do whatever I want, whenever I want for the ENTIRE day.  Good GOD, I wouldn't know what to with myself.

Why is it when mothers are asked a simple question of what THEY want do they always feel that the answer must involve someone else in some way?  Why did the article have to devolve into some discussion on how working mothers feel guilty that they just can’t get everything done at home and spend quality time with their families?  Do the challenges of working moms (and dads) need to be discussed since, according to the article, 70% of us are working?  For sure.  But why does an article that’s starts out asking these moms what they REALLY want for Mothers Day have to end with the “I’m not a good Mom because I have to work and I just can’t devote enough to my family” vibe? The third sentence in the article is a quote from one Mom: “I don’t even miss time for myself.” 

Are you SERIOUS???? News Flash…I do! Up until about a year ago, I wasn't even guaranteed the opportunity to use the bathroom alone. And it’s still about 60/40 that someone won't come looking for me. At least the odds are in my favor now. Those long runs I mentioned up there?  I look forward to them...dare we say cherish them... because it’s my time to be alone with my own music and my own thoughts. 

It’s as if the proper, expected response is “I want nothing more than to spend a wonderful day with my husband and kids.” (actual quote from the article) or “I don’t need anything as long as my family is happy and healthy.”  La De Da De Da…And all is right with the world.

I’d be willing to place some money on the fact that there are a lot of other mothers, both working AND stay at home, that want the same thing as me for Mother’s Day.  And a bunch of father’s too when it's their turn. Come Father’s Day, I’m more than willing to return the favor, because I bet that Ted would love being left alone for a day too.  Just don’t make us feel all guilty about giving a completely honest, although less than altruistic response to the question.  Parenting is tough work and everyone needs a mental health day now and then.  And it's ok to admit it.

Four

Teddy turned four last Saturday.

How is it that we are at four already?  Though some of the baby features are still there, the button nose, the dimples, the fat feet and little hands, it is clear that he is more little boy than baby at this point and becoming a little boy more and more each day.  He tries his best to keep up with his big sister and plays with the big kids in the neighborhood as much as they'll let him.  He holds his own and has been known to be the one to cause the trouble rather than be the recipient of it.  We're still learning the ways of the word no and what it means not to get your way all the time. This summer is going to be an adventure with him.

He's still the snuggler he was as a newborn.  During those quiet moments at home he prefers to be sitting right next to you, prefers to be close to or touching someone at all times.  If he had his way, he would sleep right next to me every night, feet shoved right underneath me for comfort.  Thankfully during the past year he learned to sleep more soundly straight through the night, although I will still get early morning requests to come "lay with me".

He still loves dinosaurs. And cars. And legos. And whatever toy his sister is currently playing with that she won't let him touch.  He loves to go in her room whenever she'll let him and try as I might I can't convince her that the more she shuts her door, the more enticing it is to him.  He got his new red Radio Flyer wagon this week and already one of his favorite things is to have her pull him in it.

I know that the coming year will be a big transition as he spends his last year in preschool and gets ready for the jump to kindergarten.  I know he become even more of a little boy.  And while part of my sheds a tear for the baby boy that he was, most of me is excited to watch him grow.  He moved into the four year old room official yesterday and he was so excited to show us his new hook and cubby this morning.  I still got my hug and kiss on the cheek at drop off but it was much more fleeting, kind of a "bye Mom, you can go, I'm going to have fun today while you're gone."  The teachers who have been there since he was a newborn commented this week on how much he's grown.  This morning showed me that he's proud of that growth too!

Happy Fourth Birthday to my Teddy Bear!