Night night, sleep tight

I have a love/hate relationship with bedtime.  On one hand, when about 6 o'clock rolls around I breathe a sigh of relief.  We've made it through another day, usually fairly unscathed.  On the other hand I panic with the thought of the things left to do before we can call it a night.  Here is the "to do" list that looms large once dinner is over:

• Clean up from dinner
• A bath for both kids, currently done together on the nights that Teddy needs a bath.
• Pjs for both kids
• Lay out tomorrow's clothes for Katherine
• Tomorrow's lunch prep for Ted
• Get the nighttime bottles laid out for Teddy
• Put the house in some type of respectable order.  This does not mean perfect, this means in some semblance of neatness so that this anal retentive person can rest easier and we start the next day somewhat put together
• Teeth brushing for Katherine
• Bedtime bottle for Teddy
• Final diaper change
• Other nighttime feeding preparations such as laying out my robe, bibs, burp cloths, cooler for half drunken night time bottles (so that I don't have to truck them down to the refrigerator in the middle of the night) in order to make the nighttime wake ups go as smooth as possible.
• Keeping an eye on Katherine during this time to ensure she doesn't end up as a TV junkie for the entire evening.  This means one or both of us taking short breaks from the list to get out toys, play a game or do some sort of activity with her.

Rarely, if ever, does that list get accomplished without some sort of unforeseen event like a lost blankie or diaper emergency.  Ted and I don't say much to each other during this time, it becomes a tag team event with us relaying messages to each other like "You handle bath, I've got the kitchen", "Hold him while I get the bottle ready" "Did she brush her teeth yet?"  We've become a well oiled machine.  And there's no rest for the weary, oh no.  I find if I even take a short break to read a magazine article, check my email or, heck, even daydream too much we're sunk.  You put your head down and trudge ahead.

Sometimes we want or need to add a task or two to the list.  For instance, last night I wanted to try to squeeze in a run after bathtime.  Usually there's a load or two of laundry that needs to be taken care of.  Most nights, Katherine wants someone to lay with her for a bit.  Once the list is complete, then and only then can we even consider pjs or any type of quiet time for ourselves.  And that list is shortened a bit right now because I'm home on leave.  Once I return to work it will include getting Teddy's clothes and bottles ready for the next day as well as my lunch.  Ted and I usually do all our ironing and clothes prep during the weekend because there is no time for it during the week.

What falls completely by the wayside?  Catching up on emails, phone calls to friends really any sort of contact with the outside world.  I have people (you know who you are) who I am way overdue some contact to from my end.  Rest assured I've been thinking about all of you and I have a million thank yous for you guys always contacting me first.

My goal is to have the list mostly done by 8 o'clock.  This means it's usually done by 8:30.  Katherine goes to bed at that time and is asleep by 9 (thanks to nap time at daycare, on weekends we can usually get her down much earlier). Teddy seems to drift off some time between 9 and 9:30, which I think is an accomplishment for a one month old.  We're usually exhausted ourselves and aren't far behind.  But on the rare night where everything falls into place and we're lounging together as a family at 8 o'clock...well...it's wonderful. It's what I long for every night.

I know it won't always be like this and I also know as the kids grow, that list will grow and change.  And there's hope that once Ted and I (ok, mostly me) are sleeping full nights again we'll want to stay up for at least an hour after the kids go to bed. For now, I'll just try to keep chugging along between the hours of 6 and 9 pm.