Why my running shoes are in the closet instead of by the front door tonight...

I was supposed to be gearing up to run the Raleigh Half Marathon tomorrow morning.  I had goals of running the whole thing, improving on my time from April and just plain having a good time.  I was impressed with my training over the summer, my speed was improving, I was hovering around 10 minute miles.

Instead I’ll be cozy in my bed tomorrow morning.  Granted, it’s supposed to be in the upper 30’s with a slight chance of sprinkles so I’m not crying, but the weather isn't the reason I won’t be running.

If you remember my after the half marathon post from April I talked about how I wound up at the emergency room two nights later with severe upper abdominal pain.  At the time we thought it was dehydration and I just plain over did it.  Lesson learned I thought.  Not quite.  Over the summer I had another episode, which I again chalked up to dehydration, it being 99 plus degrees and humid around here.  The pain returned again this fall and was much more frequently, there have been a few weeks where I had an episode every day.  I talked about it with my doctor during my annual checkup and she felt it was a musculoskeletal issue and suggested PT to strengthen my upper abdominals.  Off I went to PT and for a few weeks I thought it was really helping.  But three Thursdays ago, I had a doozy of an attack, equal to that night in April, at work.  When you turn to your husband and tell him that the pain you’re experiencing is worse than childbirth, you know you’re in some serious pain.  I ended up at my primary’s office instead of the ER because I wanted answers, not just treatment of the immediate situation.  What followed was a series of blood tests, all of which were normal (as they were in April) and then this past Thursday, an upper abdominal ultrasound which revealed that I have gallstones.

Now in the realm of things that could be wrong with me, things could be much worse. It turns out there’s a family history here, so that fact that I don’t meet the classic profile gets trumped by plain old genetics.  At this point, I've been referred to a gastroenterologist to further assess the situation and decide on treatment.  In the meantime, I’m really watching what I eat and am laying off the running until the everything is taken care of.  While exercise is actually good for me, I think when I run, the stones shift around and it triggers an attack (hey, I am a doctor, so I’m allowed a little self diagnosis, aren't I?).

So, I’ll enjoy my extra hour of sleep tomorrow and stay cozy warm under the blankets while all of the runners are lining up at the starting line.  In spite of the situation that brought me here, I’m not feeling bad one bit about missing out on the race.  There’s always next year!

Our Life in Pictures

Or I should say, the kids life in pictures over the past few weeks.  I've got a lot of idea for blog posts but they'll have to wait.  In the meantime, enjoy this:

Big boy

I guess with the second kid things just seem to happen quicker. It wasn't that long ago that he was trying to figure out how ride this.

Our neighbors gave us their son's old 12 inch bike last weekend. Teddy immediately fell in love with it..."My bike!" I was in no way prepared for this:

Did your heart skip a beat as he was careening down that hill? Mine sure did. In addition to that he's making the transition to big boy underwear, dry all this week at daycare AND we're finally starting to let go of paci, hasn't used it at naptime in over 5 days. All good things, yes. But wow, it's like it's all happening all at once. A mommy can only take so much.

Not to worry though, he still holding to his usual sleep pattern...mom doesn't need a full night of sleep in her own bed. Nope, not at all.

First Gymnastics Class

She loved it!

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First Grade

Pool Gram

That was her name given to her by my sister because, well, they had a pool in their backyard (duh!). The pool came down when I was really small but the name stayed. She passed away Friday night, 90 years old and, until this spring, lived very independently at home.


The pictures you see above and below are her holding a baby Katherine and a baby Teddy on the weekend of their baptisms. There are some wonderful old pictures of her that I thought I had scanned in but now can’t seem to find. They are real gems of pics, my grandma as a small child with her brothers with an adorable toddler scowl on her face, my grandparents wedding picture at Fort Riley, Kansas, her posing with my dad as a baby with the inscription “As Always, Mary and Franny” written in the bottom corner.

In 2003 Ted and I were preparing for our wedding when he was deployed to Iraq. She called me a day or two later and told me “I know how you feel.” I knew that she knew exactly how I felt, probably the only one in my family who could directly relate to what I was going to. Her support and comfort meant the most along the way. And now I realize that my experience paled in comparison to hers. In her time there was no email, no constant news feed or imbedded reporters. She was newly married, pregnant then caring for a newborn (my dad)…I don’t know how she did it. I don’t think she knew how she did it either, she didn’t question, she just did what needed to be done.

One of my earliest “flashbulb” type memories is laying in the crib at my grandparents’ house. I had to have been in the crib by the positioning of myself in the room because that’s where the crib was when we were small. It was daytime so I must have been put down for a nap. I also remember sleeping over their house, playing in the kiddie pool in their backyard (the pool long gone), Christmas Eve’s in their living room (all 15 of us squished in there!), riding in the backseat of the car, working on puzzles and activities together. I can still hear her laugh. There are certain sights, tastes and smells that I will forever associate with her and my grandfather: Progresso Minestrone Soup, downtown Springfield, the smell of some fertilizers (they were ChemLawn customers), music from the 40’s. They were committed members of Our Lady of Hope Catholic Church in Springfield…correctly pronounced in one word as “Ourladyahope”. Their pew was on the right as you walked in, about 10 rows up from the door, on the end closest to the wall.

This passing also means that all of my grandparents are gone a bittersweet milestone that I knew would come one day. There’s a picture on my dresser, the last picture of me taken with all of them. It’s my college graduation, sunny and warm. There they all are in their finest suits. They told me they were so proud of me that day. I hope I’ve continued to make them proud. I know not everyone is lucky enough to know their grandparents, I am very fortunate to have had a wonderful relationship with all of my grandparents and I’m grateful that my kids are forming great relationships with theirs as well. As I grow older I see a part of each of them in me. I know I get my stubbornness, my knack to just keep pecking away at something until it’s finished from Pool Gram. My “that table is crooked by about an inch”. I think about the hundreds of sweaters, hat, mittens and blankets she’s knitted…all of them perfect. She taught me how to knit (and sew) multiple times, it never stuck…I just didn’t have the patience for it…and I knew whatever I did wouldn’t be perfect.

I’ll be traveling back up to Massachusetts Wednesday morning to attend the services. I didn’t expect to be going back up so quickly (we just arrived home on Thursday) but it really is a blessing for her. I hope the first person she saw in heaven was my grandpa holding the baby girl she never got to meet. Now they have eternity to get to know one another.

At the car wash...

Getting ready to help Daddy wash the car.





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